To sleep, perchance
My default is to be very habituated. Not rigidly so, i don't think, but i do function better overall when i've got a pattern to stick with. It's like scaffolding for everything else. The difficulty lately is that my sleep habits need work. Aging + IBS + migraines + depression = kinda fucky rest. This morning, i popped awake at 2:50am, after 5.5 hours of sleep. Like, so awake that i got up and did the dishes.
Which. Usually the dishes get done before bed. But migraine. So.
Did i wake at 2:50am because that's when the migraine wore off? Because some part of my brain needed me to do the dishes? Because I'd read on a screen too late? Because the AC needed adjusting? All of those are true things. But was there even a cause?
Recently, i started insomnia-focused cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT-i). I do suspect it'll work for me, eventually. Right now though, i'm at the "overthinking everything" stage. It's frustrating. And not exactly conducive to...going back to sleep. Which i never really did, this morning.
- today's tea: gunpowder
- current soundscape: Classical Guitar Alive (radio) and occasional airplane fly-by's
- currently reading: Eat Up! (Ruby Tandoh)